Goodbye!

Saying Goodbye was not that easy. I seemed to be strong, but deep down my soul I was broken into tiny pieces.
I said Goodbye to the life you brought to my world.
I said Goodbye to our commitments.
I said Goodbye  to our memories.
I said Goodbye to our dreams.
I said Goodbye to our future home.
I said Goodbye to our messages.
I said Goodbye to our hug.
I said Goodbye to our pictures.
I said Goodbye to our life.
I said Goodbye to our vision.
I said Goodbye to our phone calls.
I said Goodbye to myself.
I said Goodbye to my feelings.
I said Goodbye to the little one inside me.
I said Goodbye …

I said GOODBYE to set you free, then I became  the prisoner of that GOODBYE. I am the one who was killed by this end. I thought that I could get over you and begin all over again, but darling that was not the case. You went away with the little one inside me. Now, I am standing alone; fighting my thoughts, feelings and myself.

#manuella_maher

 

 

Let your eyes speak…

Eyes have power of souls, everyone’s eyes are mirrors to theirs souls and thoughts. We are all full of unspoken feelings and thoughts, our conversations will never depend on our verbal words, there is something deeper that can not be expressed in some words. Here comes our eyes’ role in reflecting what’s going on inside our souls.
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Ughhh, I am tired of trying to hide my feelings , my inner thoughts and my insecurities.
All in vain .
My eyes are always speaking.
My eyes are always revealing what I am painfully trying to hide.
My eyes are the open gates of my soul .
Now, I am sure that whatever I am trying to hide,my eyes will always say the truth.

 

 

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” Dirty , ugly , weak, coward , lonely, needy , bad, stupid, foolish , unwanted , disqualified , never good enough…”
I am done with these labels.
No more believing in what others say about me and my life .
I am welcoming you to come into my life through my eyes.
please look deeper into my eyes and see how I insisted on living when life was unbearable.
How needy I am for unconditional love that could accept me for who I am not for my physical appearance.
Stop judging me and putting labels all over my life.

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“It’s cold”
Wrapping her body with all what she has is in vain.
Walking to get extra energy to be warm is in vain.
Hiding  all her body in black to absorb any energy from the sun is in vain.
It’s not about weather , It’s about feelings.
It’s not about her body, It’s about her soul.
Where is the sun of her soul ?! The deep senses of joy, peace , and love are missed .
All what she needs is to warm up her soul not her body.
To be wrapped with love.
To overcome her fears and insecurities.
To be stubborn with her coldness , to  be focused , to be determined and to  be strong.

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Yeah, I am this little boy.
I am a survivor.
I am a warrior.
I am a fighter.
I am this one who is strong enough to fight loneliness , depression, illness, ignorance, poverty, failure…etc
They left me but I survived.
I was in the war of negative feelings and thoughts, but I was a brave warrior.
Nothing went right in my life but I was a fighter.
I believe in my self.
This very big smile reflects the victory I have achieved, and my hope to have a better life.

 

 

These four pictures are nothing but a reflection of four souls through their eyes.
Don not neglect what eyes are saying, and let your eyes speak.

SHE!

Don’t fear, don’t panic… She is not alone; she is filled with people; their thoughts, their hopes and what she hears from them every day.

She is not in pain, those dark strings do get tight and hurt but they make her stronger, they make her a fighter, they make her who she is.

She is not filled with darkness; she is filled with light, an enlightened vessel filled with dark thoughts; a white paper filled with dark lines. That is what makes her readable and useful.

She is not crying; she is just looking back to experiences, memories and unforgotten words, whether they were happy or bad, they still painted her life, and even if it is with dark colors, she remains a beautiful drawing.

She is not one person; she is filled with stories; stories of all the girls, all of her age, her generation, her family, her friends and herself.

A girl is a story that unfolds itself every day, she is strong and independent. If you want to be a part of her life, be; but don’t have the urge to always take care of her… she is completely capable of that. So, take care before you hurt her… She is in no need for more pain.

 ” Dirty , ugly , weak, coward , lonely,  needy , bad, stupid, foolish , unwanted , disqualified…”
She is done with these labels.No more believing in what others say about her and her life .
She is welcoming anyone to come into her life and She is ready to tell her story; how She insisted on living when life was unbearable, and how needy She is for  unconditional love that could accept me for who She is, NOT for  physical appearance.
Stop judging her. This girl has been used for several years . Yes She has been used not loved; Men used her body, her friends used her time for their own needs and left her alone when she needed them, and finally her parents left her chained.
It is her time to live, to love and to be free.
Its her time to be a human.
Its  her time to enjoy her rights and learn from her mistakes.
Its her time and your time to get up and dance despite her and your past.

Continue reading SHE!